Confession......

peppers still in the fridge. 

How long will roasted peppers last? 


(Have I mentioned I'm not wild about cooking?)

And I Say to Myself....

"What a wonderful world!"

Know that song?  I share the songwriter's joy in nature almost daily, and I love the line about "friends meeting friends, saying 'How do you do'....they're really saying, 'I love you'".....but I wish I felt in general "What a wonderful world" more often, instead of lamenting all the ills of our world. 

I did feel that way on my birthday.  Fifteen of the snowbird women I've been getting to know down here came over for hors d'oeuvres and wine and birthday cake and coffee and it was an absolutely lovely evening.  Having lived as a single since age 28 (single mother, though, blessed with my son) I've come to the comforting realization that as long as there are people in the world, I am never really "alone."  So many friendly, caring people everywhere you go.

Here I've found an outstanding example of that.  The people I'm getting to know who also snowbird down here are all such fun, such varied individuals, every one of them with fascinating life stories.  (Discovered the same thing in other areas I've spent winters over the last five years, too...)

And while I hesitate to post the group photos of us all, not knowing them well enough to know whether they might have objections to their pictures appearing on a public blog like this, I can post the birthday cake....replete with sixty candles, because it's been a long time since I've had my own birthday cake and I wanted to blow them all out!  (And did so just in time to save the cake decorations from burning up!)

(Click to enlarge)

Chocolate with fudge layers and chocolate buttercream frosting...mmmmm!

So to those of you who haven't lived alone, but may find yourself so in years to come, know that there are so many caring people for you to find in the world, that you are never really alone.

SIXTY!!!

Today I am sixty!         Oh.  My.  God.

I don't feel sixty.  I don't even feel fifty.  And if you revert to my original blog post in September, you will recall that I feel some age "post-28."

I have never been bothered by age "numbers".....ever.....not even now.  (Do you believe I actually had a girlfriend who cried when she turned thirty?!  I mean, get a grip!)

But what did hit me back when I turned fifty was the realization of my mortality, no matter how young I felt.  And it's hitting me even more now.  If I am lucky, I only have 20 or so years left on this earth. (If I am not lucky, even fewer.)  Now that really is sobering and I don't like it one bit.

In many ways, I feel so blessed and content.  Blessed to have retired early.  Blessed to be healthy.  Blessed to have a healthy son and healthy grandchildren.  Blessed by friends and family.  Blessed to have been born in America.  Blessed to have lived through great strides being taken by women, which afforded me a career of my own and independence.

But I'm always looking for something to pour myself into.  Something that will "help the world."  So far, in my retirement, I haven't found it. And I start feeling a little panicky, like time is running out.  But then I get to thinking of my life and all of the students I taught and the ones who came back to visit or write and thank me for being their teacher (believe me, there are plenty who don't have one good thing to say about me, too....) and I realize in some small ways, maybe I did that already. 

On the heels of that thought, I muse that most of us aren't meant to help the world in big, earth-shattering ways anyway.  That most of us, by loving and guiding and setting as good as an example as we can for our own children and grandchildren, are doing something "for the world."  We are building a stable, ethical societal foundation.

And we can augment that by being active volunteering in our communities, donating goods and money to charitable organizations, lending our skills wherever they are needed.

So while I'm dabbling with volunteerism, but haven't found a "passion" for which to pour myself into yet, I will "keep on keeping on" (for you young-ins, that's a Sixties phrase) and be thankful for the sixty years I've lived and all that I am fortunate to have experienced.

Happy Birthday to Me

Half of the Weekend Goal

You are probably wondering where the heck is my review and photo of the Carrot and Red Pepper Soup I vowed I'd make this past weekend.

Uh, well, um...............mostly still in the cookbook.

But hold on!  I did (for the first time ever) roast the red peppers in the broiler!  Hey now, that's a biggie for me.  (Rub skins with canola oil, place in broiler, turning until skins are blackened, put into glass bowl and cover tightly with foil to "steam" and after 20 minutes, peel off skins and scrape out seeds.)

That's as far as I got.  Because you see, I need to go get soy milk.  And I hate going to the grocery store.

So the red peppers are wrapped in the fridge, waiting for me to do that.

Then I'll make the soup.

Seaside and Watercolor

Warning:  Be prepared for the reaction you might have reading this post, given that it occurs just chronologically after the post about the Haiti Earthquake rescue efforts.  What a world.  Such poverty and such wealth existing together.

My new friend (and also a retired English teacher from the snowbird group, who just happens to live down the same street in the resort where I'm renting this winter) and I took our bikes down to Seaside, Florida, which sits along #30A and the beach.  You can bike along #30A for miles and miles, although we only clocked in about 45 minutes before stopping at the Great Southern Cafe, where she ordered:  

Gritsà YaYa

Smoked Gouda cheese grits smothered with a sauté of applewood-smoked bacon, spinach, shallots, garlic, portobello mushrooms,and cream, finished with spiced shrimp and sweet potato hay,

and I ordered the:

Vegetable Plate 

which was cheddar mashed potatoes, fried green tomatoes, sauteed green beans and a choice of several other veggies that I didn't want, so I doubled the green beans choice.

Both were yummy, though I've resolved to order her choice next time I'm there.  It's what the cafe is reknown for and I can see why (she generously offered me a taste....smoked gouda cheese grits?!  Heaven!)

Seaside is an absolutely charming beach town.  Watercolor is an equally beautiful beach town development up the road from Seaside.  Both are fairly new (checked real estate listings and seems much of both was built within the last 5-10 years).  These towns are reminiscent of old beach towns, with cobblestoned and white picket-fenced streets lined with cottages, all with front porches holding lemonade tables and wicker furniture, separated by sandy paths leading through the neighborhoods down to the beach.

With one big exception:  Real estate in this town is rare below $1M and goes up past $3M.  For a "cottage"!

But wait until you see these cottages.  (Who are all of these people who can afford multi-million dollar beach cottages?  No one I know!  On top of that, it was absolutely rare that we saw any cottage looking inhabited!  Deserted, at least in winter.)

(Most can be enlarged by clicking on them)

Haiti Disaster

My laptop flashed a bright green screen at me this morning, telling me there was an attempt to change my registry or something like that.  I clicked and clicked the "don't allow", but it kept popping back up.  Before I could see the bubble on the desktop toolbar instructing me to click there to "fix" the problem, I had already hit "shut down" and it was going through its motions.  I tried in vain to stop the shutdown.

Alas, after rebooting, it would not even load my desktop.  And I tried for two hours, sitting patiently waiting (at last, ending by yelling my favorite swear word, of course).  Stomping out into the rain, I diverted my course from the local Best Buy (oh, how I hate the idea of those teen Geeksquaders touching my computer) to the local library to do email, print out Dell tech support numbers (which I stupidly did not bring with me for the winter) and search for local computer techs.

But my day has turned from bad to worse.  Online, I could not ignore today's news of the little 11-year-old Haitian girl, whom I watched for hours the other day, as rescuers tried to free her without resorting to leg amputation.  Happily, they succeeded and last I knew, she was free and alive and doing well.  One of the successful and hopeful rescue stories.

However, my computer greeted me this afternoon with news that she had died an hour later of severe wounds to her leg and shoulder (how does that happen?  blood loss?  blod clot?  a piece of bone marrow lodging in the heart?  what?!?)  Update:  How elementary of me not to recall -- infection, of course.  It's just so rare to hear of anyone in the U.S. dying from infection from a broken leg or that type of injury (Mersa, yes) because we take antibiotics for granted.  And antibiotics these first days of the rescue have been undersupplied.  Her last words were to her mother:  "Mother, don't let me die!"

Biting my lip hard, I escaped the computer station and ran to the ladies' room.  I am still undone by this turn of events and by the intensity of my reaction.  (And somewhat validated to see that Campbell Brown, reporting on the story, was moved to tears as well....what mother cannot be?)

My heart is broken.  For her and for her mother.  How does one ever go on after something like that?

Thank you, Lord, for my son's and grandchildren's lives.  I am blessed and I am grateful.   Please watch over them all.

Laptop problems?  Those aren't problems at all.

Not one bit.

For Parents

A Grandparent's Advice to Parents

"Everyone should be a grandparent before they're a parent." I don't know who first penned this genetically impossible advice, but they're right. We grandparents have much better hindsight than foresight, and, if we could do it over again, most of us would make some adjustments. So just in case there are young parents reading this, who are wiser and more teachable than I was at their age, here is one grandparents' advice to parents:

Find a way every day to show your children that you love and believe in them. Do a lot of hugging and don't stop when they become teenagers.

Take time to know each of your children as individuals. What are their dreams and fears? What are they good at? What can you do to help them develop their own unique interests and abilities?

Set and enforce boundaries. Be willing to be the bad guy. Don't let your own guilt keep you from being tough when you must be.

Be candid about your own mistakes. Be willing to change your mind, admit wrong, and openly apologize.

Be patient. Remember that the path to success is paved with failures, and don't forget that one of the reasons kids have trouble being perfect is that they have imperfect parents.

Be accepting. Remind your children often that home is a place they can find forgiveness and new beginnings.

Remember that some opportunities come only once. Few of us grandparents feel regret because we once missed an important business meeting to spend time with a child.

Don't judge other parents or children. It will come back on you. Never say "never" (as in "My child would never do that").

Don't over-program. Leave your child room to be creative.

Begin at an early age to give children responsibility and don't be afraid to let them fail. Also don't cover for them when they do. Part of growing up is learning how to mend one's own mistakes.

Laugh a lot.

Be silly together.

Sing a lot.

Let your children know they live in a harsh world. Talk candidly of accidents and crime. Maybe let them role play how they would respond to each. Also things such as camping in the wilderness can help children develop resourcefulness and toughness.

Be concerned about the hearts and minds of children. Work on their "want-tos." If they develop a love for things that are good for them, you won't worry as much when they leave your home.

Help your children find mentors such as scout or school leaders, coaches, youth directors, summer camp counselors, and family friends (remember the times; you must do some investigating and screening on your own). Also develop your own mentors (can be your parents and grandparents) to help advise you about parenting.

Do things to keep yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally healthy. If you allow your children to keep you from daily exercise, alone time, or regular times away from the children with a spouse and/or friends; you will find it hard to be a good parent.

Finally, give yourself permission to really enjoy your kids. What could you do right now that would give pleasure to both you and your child? Some day you will long for such an opportunity.

from Best Years, by Mike Bellah